Samantha E-tails a Truck


Hats Hats Hats. We all wear them. Too many of them. The only people who don’t wear many hats are government workers. They usually have one hat and full pensions for life. Not like the rest of us.

The phone rings in our office. Between us we’re wearing 7 hats, working on 40 tasks, with 15 windows and applications open.  I put on the eighth hat and answer.

“Hello, is this Coldfire?” A woman’s voice with a loud roaring noise in the background.

“Yes, this is Coldfire, who’s calling?” I close one window so I can focus.

“This is Samantha, I found your name, just now, on the internet. I was wondering if you help smaller businesses. I have a bigger agency helping but they don’t pay any attention to me. I think I need someone local who doesn’t mind smaller companies. My agency likes corporate clients. I think they don’t care about my business.

“Well, that is terrible,” I commiserated, barely hearing her over the roar. “What’s that noise in the background?”

“Oh, I am on the free way, I-95.” she blurted. “WAIT, I have a truck on my butt.”

I plugged my free ear anticipating screeching brakes and crunching metal. I-95 is the busiest road on the east coast, or any coast for that matter. Truckers in their huge rigs honestly believe cars should be banned and chase down the smaller, weaker vehicles filled with terrified passengers. Samantha is someone I have never met but clearly she was taking a huge risk by being on the phone in such a place while driving.

“I’m back,” she said and proceeded to tell me about the truck before telling me about her new online store, her desire to become known and all the usual things that everyone in her shoes wants for a song.

She began to tell me her story of being an online retailer who sold her business, but is starting over with new products that everyone is drooling over and magazines are pestering to write about. “All I need is a new shopping cart. I tried to do it myself but I simply do not have time to learn this whole thing. I just don’t.”

I tried to halt my recurring image of Samantha looking up website developers in Google on her iphone while barreling down the I-95. Choosing us because we were on top of the search engine. Then calling us to find out who we are and why she should use our services.

I do love these new customer calls but safety comes first. I convinced Samantha to get off her cell phone by promising to call her back after I looked at her current website. She agreed and hung up.

Whats the point of my story?

Online retail is back and, while it is not yet back with a vengeance, it is getting stronger every day. No question about it, e-tailers like Samantha are in a virtual panic to beat everyone back into the market with their wares. They know shoppers. They know that most of America loves to spend money and generally can’t spend it fast enough.

That’s why Samantha could not wait until she got back to her office. She is a shopper and she can smell the retail market starting to cook like good ribs over an open flame, the smell unbearably tantalizing.

We love to help the Samantha’s of the world. We just wish they would not get so hungry while driving.

Tell us a story about your hunger for business. Just log in and start driving… uh, writing. We would love to hear from you no matter which hat you are wearing.

One Response to “Samantha E-tails a Truck”

  1. Barbara says:

    This article is a riot. I can relate to these kind of phone calls too. I never know what to expect but I know that if I am driving … I am driving! Not talking to someone about my business. Thanks for the laugh.

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